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Blinded by tears (WT)

Posted on Thu May 6th, 2021 @ 7:26am by Commodore Keiben Haistro & Commander Peter Horn

1,648 words; about a 8 minute read

Mission: Episode 3 - Fear Is Fear Itself
Location: Deck 4 - Hallway and Sickbay
Timeline: Mission Day 1 @ 1200 Hours

Ilyas ran, though he had no idea where too. The boy had just heard that his father, his idol, had been severely injured and had to stay in sickbay. His mother and older brother had gone to visit, but he had straggled. The idea of visiting dad, and seeing him as less than the proud man he knew him to be, the very idea was frightening.

So, Ilyas had refused to go, refusing to go into sickbay. He had peeked inside and caught a glimpse of a pale looking man that was probably his father but it was indeed far from the man he knew. "How dare he," the boy fumed as he ran, roughly fisting the tears from his eyes. "He promised!"

A little further down the hallway Keiben was on his feet, still limping but he was finally ambulatory once more. He had intended to hobble his way to sickbay to see Commander Horn but heading directly towards him he could sense the ball of anger, upset, frustration, confusion and upset, it was barrelling towards him and under neither all of this emotion he could sense that it was Ilyas.

Keiben went down on one knee somewhat awkwardly and as the boy appeared around the corner he held his arms out to catch him and pull him into a hug, holding him closely, encouraging him silently to let go, allow himself to feel everything that was bubbling up within him. He said nothing, just held the boy until he was ready to speak.

No no! Ilyas didn't want to be held. He pounded the back of the person who had caught him, tears streaming down his face. He had seen his face before barrelling into him. "This is your fault," he sobbed, "you sent him there...now daddy is very hurt and he won't be whole again!"

"I know... and the thing that hurt your father also hurt me, it hurt Jelani Olowe as well and it killed my very dear friend Yelena... and it is all on me. Not as your fathers friend but as his Commanding Officer and I am sorry!"
Keiben relaxed his arms, allowing the boy to wriggle out of his grip if he wanted to.

The boy wiggled free but sat on the deck across from him. A dark look crossed his face, thinking that it was good the captain got hurt by it too. But he bit back the words, feeling it was unfair to say so. But this was his dad! What did he care about others, when his dad was hurt bad. "Why are you up then, if you're hurt too? You don't look hurt."

Perhaps it was for the best that he didn't have his father's telepathic talents, and was well beyond untrained in it. Being mostly human, it was still in question whether he'd be anything more than an empath, if that at all. Even if he did have some nanos in his blood, he wasn't anywhere near dependent on them as his father was.

"The machine on the planet took over my mind... It took everything that I had to fight it and it wasn't enough. The same thing happened to your father as well. My away team had to stun me and I'm still trying to find my strength again" he started with, not sure if he was down playing it enough, not knowing what he had been told about how his father had been hurt. "And I am going to see your father now... I'm just finding it hard to walk I feel that weak!"

"Then he didn't fight enough," the boy said harshly, "and you shouldn't be up if you're weak. Didn't the doctor tell you to stay put too? Dad wasn't allowed up yet, I heard that much. SO why are you up?" He glared at the man, making no move to help him up to his feet.

Keiben couldn't help but smile, one he had to smother as quickly as it started for fear of upsetting the boy even more. "He fought as hard as he could, as did I but it was simply stronger than both of us combined and Doctor D'BrooNi did tell me to stay put... but Commander Horn... Peter is my friend and its not far from my quarters to get to sickbay!"

Ilyas wagged a finger at him, pulling his face in the most stern expression he could produce in his stressed condition. "You should listen to the doctor," he said, "she's boss...and you're the captain and you can't not be alright." In his boyish fantasy, captains were almost akin to gods. Indestructible, and someone to look up to.

"Well If you can help me get to sickbay and then back to my quarters I'll be in your debt... if you can keep my secret that Captains are not as indestructible as they make out!"
Keiben pressed the boy slightly to go and see his father, even if it was with the man who in Ilyas' eyes had caused his father to be injured in the first place.

The boy grunted under the man's weight as he helped him up to his feet. "How can I keep a secret when you're out here for every passing person to see?" he challenged, grimacing as he struggled. "Gosh you're heavy!"

"I know I've been off my feet for a day or so... have I put that much weight on?" he asked the boy very tongue in cheek, "And given the time of day we shouldn't pass many people in the hallways".

"And how many have you passed so far?" The boy shot back, panting for breath as he hauled his heavy load along. "Dad's over there," he added as they entered sickbay, "It's not far, you can make that."

"I can, thank you Ilyas... Come and sit with us for a time!"
Keiben pulled a seat over and clumsily dropped into it next to Commander Horn's bed. How to start? In truth how could he start. It was his fault after all ultimately. But then again how many people had been subject to the machines vicious power. Horn, Olowe, Kotan, Yelena and to a degree Mel although they were still trying to understand what had happened there.

"How are you doing Peter?" Keiben asked trying to force his guilt yo one side.

"Not well," Peter answered, watching his youngest child hesitate a few paces away. Quietly, he patted the bed with his good hand but otherwise didn't address the boy. He knew Ilyas would come to him in his own time. "And you can stop hiding the guilt you feel, you could not have known this would happen. Yes, you are responsible for all of us as our commanding officer, but you are hardly psychic."

"You'll never stop me feeling that towards my crew, and my friends!"
Keiben knew Peter would understand what he had said but Keiben could also feel that this was more therapy for the boy than it was for the adults now. He could also tell that Peter needed his son to understand and accept what had happened so the Captain started to connect with Peter, hoping his Telepathy was strong enough to read what Keiben was saying.
'I have spoken to the boy and he's afraid for you, hates that I put you in this situation and can't come to terms with it... He has opened up to me. I can continue talking to him if you like... try and help bring him round?'

"Why would I make you stop feeling as you do?" Peter asked, "it makes you into who you are." His eyes widened briefly as suddenly his mind flooded with the captain's mental voice but he did nod. "Yes, please do. And please speak normally, I cannot respond in kind as it is too exhausting for me, and for you. As I said this was not your fault. You could not have known, and eventually I will be fine. It will take time, but I have endured worse before."

"When you are on your feet again I want to see you and your family for dinner with Mel, Charlie and myself... if you are amenable?"
He gently squeezed Peters arm once more just as the intercom chirped and the voice of one of their resident Cardassian's came over the line asking if Keiben and Commander Holt could go to their quarters.
"A Captains duty is never done... Could I as for your help again Ilyas? I need to get to the turbolift!"

Peter flinched visibly at the touch. Didn't the captain know not to touch Vulcans without invitation to do so? His eyes travelled to his youngest son and gave him a minute nod. Yes he could go with the captain. Clearly his rebel son was bonding with the man, and if the child considered the man a role model, then he would encourage that.

Seeing the nod -and the flinch- Ilyas smiled at his father. Minutely so, but it was something. He reached to help the captain to his feet. "You shouldn't touch dad," he whispered, "he doesn't like it."

"Of course... You see, this is why I need your help Ilyas!"
The Captain nodded to his Counsellor and started to rise from the seat, putting his arm around the boys shoulders to support himself if only in part knowing his full weight would likely be too much for the lad to take.

The boy grunted but straightened anyway, not wanting to appear weak. "You shouldn't be up at all," he scolded, "you're just like dad, if he'd have a chance he'd up and leave too. Just ask mum..."

"I shall make a note of that!" the Captain jested as the boy did what he could to support the Betazoid away from sickbay.

END

 

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